Infidelity -Its Physical or Mental ???

yes you have read it right ...

i am asking you , whats your opinion..

in our generation we come across a lot of people which lot of twisted life events....
divorce, infidelity, extra marital affairs ..... and poor LOVE is all to blame....

there will be a lot of people judging the above group ....
they might not be part of the heinous crime as they call it extra marital affair , but among them there would be bigger lot who would want to do it but don't have the courage to so they simply blame the ones who do it...

when you ask them if its in your mind , if you are really lusting for a stranger other than your partner then are you not being incorrect and the simple answer that comes is "wanting to murder someone and murdering someone are different" so 'coz they are 'wanting' they are not incorrect but those who go beyond 'wanting' to 'doing' are the wrong ones...

But i say is murder and cheating all the same, is there not a difference between them....

If you are committed to your partner mentally and physically both are you doing the justice to them, are you in Love then ?

Tough Choices !!!

its not just me or you or your best friend , but its everyone, everyone of us are there at some point or the other....

Where choosing the right from the wrong becomes tough
When we are clouded by emotions and need time to think straight ..
When we need to know if your happiness is more important than others ..
When being selfish is Ok and when its not
When you need to be Sane and leave Insanity behind....

But these tough choices that we are forced to make , Its never easy, remember we call them tough choices ....but

if we can choose wisely....
they make us a better person than we are already .....   So for the tough decisions you have made and are about to make ..... best of luck... be sane...

Loosing Virginity !!!

In my previous post i have written about Life time of Mating, surely they are not humans :)

But at the same time there is one more discussion ......

We young generation, move too fast....
Now we make sure that no one knows we are still virgin....
loosing virginity is like a big thing for youngsters .... as if there is some exam they need to appear sometime and as much experience they can accumulate is that good....
I am not a person ..who says its wrong..
but we need to understand something more ...   Is Virginity a virtue ....
Or if loosing it is really so Cool....

If you ask me , i would say one thing....
Surely possessing Virginity is not a virtue but at the same time loosing it just for the sake of loosing it is also not so cool....

Loosing or keeping your virginity should happen only when you are a legal adult....
when you can deal with consequences if any...
and most importantly ....
you should loose it for the one person whom you love and who loves you back ..... not just for some trickster or not for the sake that none of your friends are virgin anymore..

Be witty in choosing and taking the big decision...
after all.. all our first times are memorable in their own way.... and you will definitely not like to have a bad memory....

The Lesson of True Love !!!

We have heard so many of them ....love stories...
Shakespeare has written them
Nicholas Sparks is writing them
Bollywood and Hollywood movies are creating them
Our Grandparents have narrated them...

But there are few love stories that are untold , unheard, but they exist...
Nature narrates them to us in its own ways ....

There are species like Gibbons, Penguins, Love birds, Swans , Alabatross, Turtle Doves
and can you believe Wolves , Black Vlutures and Bald Eagles also , form a life time of bonding and mating.....

We humans at some point of time were just like them ....
 fall in love , get married and consumate your love ..... then form a bond for eternity ......

Now also in many countires there is a rule to have one spouse at a time....
But then there is no rule or no concept of Mating for a life time....

When 2 swans twist their neck and form the Heart shape , they have decided for a life time of mating....
Love Birds cannot live any longer when one of them dies .....
the Gibbons are co-dominating creatures, the male and female are treated equal in their relation .....

Penguins share their responsibilities every mating season and raise their kids in unison and god forbid if one of them falls traps to the cruel nature or the predators ... the other takes on the responsibility of raising the kid and vows for 'no more love with anyone else'

But
We humans just move too fast.... living in the moment and moving on at the next chance ....
Is our love story good enough to be passed on to the next generation .....

Oppurtunity of the open Window !!!

Have you ever heard that.... the Oppurtunity of the Open Window...

There are few people who know, few understand the importance of it and then there are few who know understand it and never implement it.....

So for the ones who do not understand ....

Its when someone u have desired for sometime to be with, for someone who u have admired and wanted to be in with a relationship is suddenly avaialble, its in between decisions , in between deciding whats next and whos next and you swoop in just in time to free them from their worries....

So, wait for the right oppurtunity and dont haste into anything ruining it... (its easier said than done i know it...)

It might sound quite manupulative , but u know what they say right... everything is fair in love and war....

Independent Gal !!!

Recently i happened to watch the movie "Heroine", starred Kareena Kapoor...
A smart, independent, top-notch actress .... her journey from fame and success to being love - struck and miserable , and then her journey to downfall and struggle for revival....

But the movie shows a lot of aspects of a lady..

How she cares for one
How she is attention seeker
How she can do anything for the one she loves
How she can go mad at thoughts of loosing the loved ones
How she is watchful, careful
How she is protective
How she is manupulative
How she sometimes plays the victim even when she is not
How she go to extreme to protect the self

There are a lot of positives and negatives, there are lot of sane and insane decisions shown in the movie...

But there is something glaringly visible , oh obviously other than the faishonable clothes and the perfect bod Kareena is flaunting , and that is insecurity ....

However rich or poor , independent or not so independent , every gal craves for Love....

Love is the ruling stone for a woman, she can ruin lives and build dynasties for the simple thing Love for someone.....
However shallow she looks , however super-egoistic she is, however strong she seems, however independent she portrays herself as.... she is a soft person in the core, the person who craves for true love, seeks her true mate, her legs become shaky when she is with him and her knees go weak when he admits his love for her...

so how-much-ever cold and independent a gal portrays her , never go by looks.......
she loves to be seeked, to be nourtured , to be protected, to be pampered....

she feels powerful not when she has wealth , health , propsperity and kingdom, not when she has hordes of servants and slaves, not even when she has an army at her command.

she is powerful when she is with the one person.. who makes her feel the most beautiful , most desirable , most adorable ...when she is secure in his arms..... then she feels her true Power .......

To know she is the most vulnerable and yet the most powerful person at the same moment .......




  

SugarLess Barfi !!!

I have recently watched the hindi movie Barfi !!!

I am not a film critic and dont aspire to be one ever....
but this movie it was so meaningful, that i am bound to write about it

A love story, a journey of a deaf-mute person falling in love , lossing it for practicality and then finally finding his true love.....

Love can happen more than once, true.....
True love can happen more than once, dont know.....
But when u find true love, than all Practicality dissolves away and you are just blissful......

A deaf and mute person and a autistic girl,
One does not have speech and one does not really learn to speak...
But the love between them speaks.....

The women's instinct when she sees a potential threat, how she feels protective of her love , how she is jealous in love, and how she loves to dress up for her love... its all there.....

RK and PC have done awesome job,
even if Mr Basu seems to have watched quite a deal of english movie to bring back some moments, some style and some music score from them,
he has woven a magic and you are going to fall for it....

It has comedy, tradedy, love, hatred, sadness, honesty, dis-honesty .... every character just plays their perfect role....
The story is simple ... but the presentation matters and Mr Basu has done a brilliant job in bringing back the era of 1972, 1978 and putting is perfectly nice with the Present.....

The by-cycle rides, the hero with a moustache (the gentleman's pehchan) , the Radio and the black and white era.... limited dialouges... some suspense and odles of emotions... makes it a perfect movie for me....

watch is once and watch it again.... enjoy the Sugar less Barfi.... its in for all seasons . moods and generations....

LOVE and Belief !!!

I recently was reading the book called "The Secret" and it says how much powerful is our power of positive thinking... how it can impact our life and how we can get it all what we want.....

I have learned Reiki and it also is the same, positive thinking helps in healing.

You just not have to think positive but you need to believe it it...

I am by birth an Optimistic , love so see the brighter side of life and everything always.. i have lot of faith in myself and the things that i have got lined up by destiny....

When then i think back and reflect on myself, then i can say i am a Hopeless Romantic.
I believe in Love... ever since and always......
I really dont believe in Knight in Shining Armour but i believe in Soulmates...
I beleve that one day i am going to meet my Mr Right,  (thoda tedha medha par mera and sirf mera)

I have always beleved it these words " Mujhe aaj bhi uska intezaar hai jise meri tarah pyaar se pyaar hai" (a dialouge from the movie 'Maine Pyaar Kiya' )

But i have never seen this happenings....
I am 28 + , soon to be 29 and if till now this has not happened to me, then when will it happen....
Now i have started doubting it all....

Ice Age 4 ...
Diego: "I don't know what's wrong with me. I can't eat, I can't sleep..."
Manny: "Oh, I know what you've got. The L word."
Sid: "Yeah, leprosy."
Manny: "No, its four letters, starts with L -- ends with E..."
Sid: "Oh yeah, lice!"
Manny: "No!"

Even Diego fell in love with Shira.

People who dont believe it it, seem to have found love much ahead of me.
So i am thinking if this Secret is true or just bullshit.....

Century !!!

This is my 100th post on this blog ( i mean on my only blog :) and it took me 5 years to write my 100th blog, don't be surprised i am still an amateur, it takes time for some )

And I am kind of clueless what shall be it, what topic shall i choose to write about......
I thought a lot and nada... no idea....nothing rings....

Co-incidently its Teacher's Day in India (5th of Sept) , celebrated on the birth date of Dr Sarvepalli Radhakrishnan (5 September 1888 - 17 April 1975), Teacher and second President of India. , who was a visionary...
He had the vision of taking education seriously in India.
"The end-product of education should be a free creative man, who can battle against historical circumstances and enemies of nature. A life of joy and happiness is possible only on the basis of knowledge and science." 

This teachers day i am not only thankful to all my teachers and the very special ones whom i have remembered fondly in this blog here (http://randomwantonthoughts.blogspot.in/2008/09/happy-teachers-day.html) , but this teachers day i am here to thank to all the people around me who have taught me something somewhere in these 28 years of my life.

 

My First M&B !!!!

I know you would be curious...
Why the hell this person is writing about her first M&B reading....
Oh ! she still has the memory at this age to tell us about her first M&B....

Wrong... All of u...

Some kids are slow... dont you know that....
And time to disclose i am one of those.....

Kids start with M&B series probably when there are in early teens
Even the one i picked (by mistake), the author says she has been reading this series from age of 11 , and she has read the generations of M&B series starting from sixties till date....

But what was i doing at 11 ?
What the kids do in their early teens i am doing in my late twenties .....
Why the hell i was/am such a slow kid ???   

But whatever damage is done is all over, no way back for me.....  

When i was not much of an ardent reader ; one of my friends used to tell me pick up one of these and read it...
She would say .....these are good.....they have everything, emotion , tragedy, action, reaction, suspense, story , plot , everything .... it would be like watching a Bollywood movie or a Chick Flick...

Though i like these movies , sweet RomComs type , i still never had any urge to indulge myself into books and even if i hoped to it some time i never really felt myself attracted to the sought after M&B ones....

But as they say 'Never Say Never' ....

Recently it just happened with me ....   When i was surfing through new arrivals in the online portal Flipkart, and i was aiming to buy a simple kind of a book, easy to read, not too loaded with emotions, probably with a happy ending ..... i somehow stumbled upon this one ..... and i liked it ... i ordered it and when it arrived .....

OH !!! on its front page there it was ...the logo....the marking....huge and nicely visible...... M&B ......

So this is how i own one of those ....The story of how i got My first M&B.....

The Perfect One !!!

Some time back i had a FB status ' Kisi mahaan insaan ne kaha hai --  "Kabhi Kabhi Imperfect chiz Perfect chiz se jyada acchi lagti hai" '

All our life we all have done a lot of things , education , job, friends , fun .... but in all these as humans we have always felt the need of a companion, someone who is exclusive for us.... 

Everyone is waiting for their Ms or Mr Perfect ...
Lot of my friends are now married or in a relationship , may be they got theirs Perfect one or may be not...

In this process a lot of people have asked me the question, what would i like to see in my Mr Perfect , what would be the qualities i would like in him...

I have tried a lot to think about the must have, good to have,must not have in him...... but i have realized one thing in this process....... 

I am not a perfect person, and no other person is perfect, 
So , if any guy is not a perfect person for me than obviously i will never be a perfect person for him also.... 
So two imperfect people .... how can they ever have a perfect life , how can they be happy and live a happily ever after life....

Truth is..... the happily ever after is always true in a perfect setting of a fairy tale world, but in this real and imperfect world we strive every day very hard to have a perfect life .....

So how to know who the Perfect person is ?

i would say the question is wrong ...... its not about the Perfect Person , its about the Imperfect Person who is just Right for you and only you ......

So for all the people who want to know what i want ..... i dont have the bullet point answer for them yet... and i dont think i will ever have it ... but one answer i have for myself.... 

The key to happy life not to find the Mr Perfect or crying about not finding Mr Perfect .... 
Adaptability and Change are the key of existence... and everyone changes in life....  

And the answer per me for a happy life with your better half is your desire to put efforts....

Its all about the effort we put in changing for a person or in making a person understand our point of view...

And till we enjoy, really enjoy and see the fun in the efforts we put for the other person , in changing our selves or in understanding them or in making them understand us ..... we can guarantee a happy life ...

So , its not about finding the Perfect one for me, but its finding the flawed one with whom i would love to change for a better life ... where both can loose some individuality and make a common identity

Winning !!!

Recently in my office we had a event.... it was fun frolic and freedom...set on the backdrop of Independence Day celebration we could see a lot of enthusciastic participants for a lot of competetions that we organized....

There were competitions targetting all kind of audiences in office.... the very energetic , very enthusciastic types.. the very sportive ones... the one good at certain games... the ones who are good at acting / singing and also for the ones who are good at jugaad ....

But something else i could see in all these events....
The main intention of these games and wide range we offered on the plate was for a sole reason of  "ice-breaking" ...
so that people know each other, the work environment improves and people get comfortable working in this environment.....

I was part of the organizing team as well as an active participant in the activities / games ..
As we had this fun-filled week going on, we had a lot Masti , i got to know a lot of people and lot of people got to know me....
The event was definitely successful.....

But during these fun games one more side of people came out....

Everyone wanted to win, everyone wanted to get a prize...
You would ask me , "So whats wrong ? " There is nothing wrong in winning or having the thoughts and aspiration to win... after all a healthy competition brings out the best in us...
But winning is required when there is a competition ... when we were just having events and not competition how does it matter who wins...
People did not just participate for fun, they participated asking what would they get if they win....

When someone wins there is someone who is losing,
but this was not at all our intention , we never intended to declare on person as winner and the others as losers......
Cant we judge which are Competitions and which are just Activities.... 

If these grown ups behave like this what would they be able to teach the future generation...

Cocktail !!!

I very recently happened to watch the newest Bollywood flick "Cocktail" ....
And the story-line invariably reminded me of few more movies....  like the SRK - Kajol - Rani Superhit "Kuch Kuch Hota Hai" or the Hrithik- Rani- Kareena flick "Mujhse Dosti Karoge"

Every time i watch such a movie a single thought keeps coming to my mind.... Why.... What....

Why... Why the hell a best friend cannot be your girlfriend...
What...What do you get being such Hypocrites...

A Gal is the best buddy to a Guy coz she is cool , bindaas , happy-go-lucky, easy to gel with kind of a person... the kind of person whom you can share everything that comes to your mind and everything that is close to your heart.....
But ... the same gal cannot ever be the girl-friend.... the girl-friend is always the more classy one , the more beautiful one, the one person who you have not known properly but you can feel the guitar playing in the back ground......

Why is this , What is this ?

Suddenly everything that mattered in your friend is useless and you need someone who would be approved by your mother....

Suddenly the bindaas attitude cannot be tolerated anymore....

A carefree , jhalli  , who knows you in a much better way has to make way for a sassy girl....
Why is that the same characters what made the gal and the boy the best of friends now are the biggest hindarances from becoming of their bf and gf...

Why is that tom-boyish attitude which is so appreciated in frnship now so hated when the same person proposes as a Beau .....

Opposites Attract !!!

We have listened to so many stories and so many songs …… the M&B classics…. Our Bollywood movies…
We have read about a rich gurl in love with a poor guy or vice versa…The Cinderella gets her Prince Charming….

And we always have seen some things common to all these….
One of such things is ….Opposites Attract….

True right… every one of us must have felt that at some time in their lives….

A strong attraction to something / someone which we don’t have … The qualities we always felt like having but never could acquire….. A charming smile…. Bubbly attitude…. A beautiful dance move… A melodious voice… A …and the list is endless…. Each one of you could add something to the list…

But I don’t know if that is all we need ‘ For a life time supply of happiness’….

How long the attraction lasts… sometimes minutes, sometimes a lifetime… But have you wondered why there is this difference ?

Is Opposites Attract enough for a love story to sustain, The Smile to have its charm at ‘teen’ and also lasting till the age of 'A set of fake teeth’….

Do you have a theory … why some love stories are momentous and some are epics… What is the secret to the ‘....And they lived happily ever after.....'

I wondered on this thought for a long time and I have realized that if a story begins with ‘Opposite Attracts’ then it would have lots of lovely chapters added to it if the second part of the story has ‘Similarity Adheres ‘…

And I feel that…

This is when you look back you can always see a lovely start and a great finish to your own classic love story…..

“Opposites Attract …But....Only Like Adheres….”